Him

I'll always miss him. I'll always love him. In a crowd of people my eyes will always search for him.  I can't change these things; they are just facts. But what happens when it actually is him? When our paths cross again. What will happen? Will it stop being wierd? Will it go back to the way it was on prom night? Will he hold me tight and whisper in my ear that he loves me? Will he hug me, like he did on that last night, like he was never going to let go? Will he just bring me close and kiss me with those really soft lips of his? Or will it swing the other way? Will he confront me and tell me he's moved on? Will I see him with another girl? Or worst of all will he just ignore me as though he never knew me at all? Like I'm nothing but a memory, the past, a phase, a girl. Does he even think of me anymore? Look at the pictures and have flashbacks of the lives we used to lead? Does he remeber the late nights of texting, the times in the jacuzzi, the parties, the meets, the movies, and best of all just lying in each others arms? I won't lie it wasn't all happy it was sad too. Scary to say the least. Unfair and painful as hell! However, despite all that, all that suffering, we had each other. We really thought that was enough. Is it? I think so. I don't know what he thinks. Not anymore anyway.  But again I have to let him go. Out of my love for him. I have to allow him to push me out, to be the leader of his own life. He always was. I'm not sure how long it will be, until we talk again. That's his call. But I am sure that he wasn't just SOME HIGH SCHOOL BOY!!! He is SO MUCH more than that! And that there is NO ONE in this world I LOVE more than HIM! Until next time catch you on the flip side.