Gender Debunked

So BEWARE rant below. I'm stepping on my gender stereotype soapbox because I'm tired of this shit for real it's 2018 for crying out loud!!!

First lets define some terms once and for fucking all:
Sex- the physical/biological reproductive organs, chromosomes, and hormones you were giving at birth. 
Gender- Something you determine on your own. The way you feel about your gender inside your brain, heart, and soul.
Sexual orientation- Who you are attracted to in a physical or romantic way. 

Now that we got those semantics out of the way go to your closet and look at your clothes. What color are they? What are they made of? Do they have cliche sayings on them or generic patterns? Superheros or rock bands?  Are you wearing dresses or pants?

My closet consists of mostly black t shirts and skinny blue jeans. With lots of converse, toms, and my beloved pair of rainbow kicks. I have too many hats to count and hoodies up the wazoo. I have dresses too, but only wear them on special occasions and take them off as soon as I can and put on some pants. 

Because I said I own dresses you're probably assuming my gender is female. Wrong. But honestly my gender is beside the point. What you wear shouldn't dictate what gender you are and what gender you are shouldn't dictate what you wear. Just because you're a boy doesn't mean you can't wear a dress. And just because you're a boy who wears dresses doesn't mean your gay, or trans, or bi either. Do your clothes have labels on them that say girls dress. Is there a law that says only girls can wear dresses? Why don't you go check? I'll wait.... NONE exactly. When my mom was young she wasn't allowed to wear jeans, because her mom wouldn't let her. My grandma said they were for boys. My grandma herself as a school teacher had to wear dresses every work day. In my 23 years of life I don't think I've ever seen her wear a dress. Does wearing pants make a woman less womanly?

It's in our culture. Just walk into Target you'll see from infant clothes all the way to adult clothes they are separated by gender. A baby has no fucking clue what sex they are. And you imposing your gender stereotypes and expectations on them is only hindering them from being their true selves. How can they truly express their gender if you suppress them. Yeah that onesie that says Mommy's little man seems harmless, but you could be completely missgendering your child. Besides is it really that critical that other people know the sex of your baby (because keep in mind you won't know your child's gender until they are older and can decide for themselves) ? Because babies are cute, precious balls of squish. People will compliment you on how cute your baby is regardless of if they know the gender or not. My mom told me when I was young people thought I was a boy and would get so mortified when she told them I was a girl that she started putting a bow on my head so people could tell the difference. You caring about how your babies sex (mistakenly gender) is viewed by others is a reflection on you and your own insecurities or not wanting to fight the status quo. I challenge you to fight norm and battle your insecurities. Say to that woman in the grocery store when they ask if your baby is a boy or a girl, "The sex of my baby is male, but we won't know Toby's gender until he decides for himself." Dress your baby boy in a dress.

At my work some of my co-workers revealed that upon their first impression they thought our manager was a lesbian based on how she dresses. We continued to have a heated discussion on if the clothes you wear matter. One of my co-workers was saying that certain clothes made my manager look like a lesbian and others made her not. 1. Who the fuck cares 2. Clothes are just pieces of fabric sewn together. Yes it is a way to express yourself, but I know for me and my manager both we feel more comfortable in stereotypical guy clothes. But why do girls always have to look pretty? why do they have to look like the object? And what is wrong with a pretty man? 

Honestly, I just want to shop in a store and buy the clothes I want without getting looked at funny. I want girls and boys to stop being pigeon holed into boxes they may not fit in. Today in a child development class I wanted to do an in-class activity on princesses and a girl in my group said no because preschool boys don't like princesses. Bullshit. The characters I loved the most as a kid were Robin Hood and Peter Pan. Tinker Bell, Pocahontas, and Belle. I thought I could sing like Aladdin and the Hunchback of Notre Dame. So don't you fucking tell me that boys don't like princesses. 

If you opened your fucking mind maybe an original thought would come in instead of this cookie cutter, I drank the kool-aid bullshit! Just letting you know I'm not buying it, not even for a second. And I'm here to tell you the world is so much more fluid and diverse than you know, step one inch out of your comfort zone and you will see.

Rant over. Until next time catch ya' on the flip side and remember whatever your gender you are beautiful to me!

Hurt

I shouldn't be, but I am.
How could you pick her instead of me?
Maybe it's just a project to you.
But not to me.
A chance to be friends
Closer, I mean. Is lost.
I think you like her,
But at what cost?
Maybe I shouldn't like you.
Maybe I should just give it up.
It's just my luck,
That you, one of my only school friends
Picks a rando for a group project
Instead of me.
The girl you got drinks with,
The girl you've walked to class with twice a week,
I know it shouldn't matter.
That I shouldn't care.
That I should just be chill,
But my mind is angry,
My heart is hurt
I thought you might be flirting.
I guess not.
I thought there might be a spark.
I guess not.
So you don't like me,
And I have the world's biggest crush on you
FanFUCKINGtastic!
Forever second best
Forever alone.